I have been writing here for almost 6 months now. I’ve written things that are true. I’ve written things that are real. Have I invited you into my hard? I’m afraid to talk about my hard, afraid I’ll be judged and rejected. But when I don’t talk about my hard you don’t get to see His presence within it. See, the only real hope of God’s love comes as you go through your hard and realize
He’s still there.
Right. There. As close as the clothes on your body. As vital as the air you breathe.
Sometimes it's easier to see hope in the story of someone else. Your pain is too close, like looking through binoculars at the tree 12 inches away. When we enter into the hard story of another brave enough to share, we have the perspective we need. We can see clearly God's hand of love and provision in the hard of another and the clarity allows a spark inside our own hearts to grow.
Maybe there's hope in my hard as well?
We are exiles here on this earth and the brutality of life takes its toll. Our hearts are bruised and broken before our brains have fully developed and we are literally programmed to fight, to run, or to freeze – to survive. So what do we do when presented with God’s love? We don’t dare to hope that it’s real. Hope will lead to disappointment and that will leave us crushed. We’ve been there before and we do NOT want to go back.
Our hearts can’t take it.
Yet, we are pursued persistently, patiently, lovingly, gently. We find that though we push Him away, the moment we turn around He is there. He is present, and He’s not shaming us for walking away. He remembers that we are dust. He has compassion on us. He loves us – no strings attached.
We are intrigued, so we try this believing in love thing. We let His love permeate the walls of our hearts with bricks made of fear and mortar made of shame, and for a moment, we feel peace. Then the phone call comes, the catastrophe happens, the hunger pangs hit, the ghosts of our past haunt. We walk away. We can’t grasp this love and what it would mean to have it present in our hard. It’s foolishness to hope instead of fear! And we have nothing to offer anyone, least of all our hurting hearts. We look to bottles and busyness, television and tidying to numb the pain. We use those around us looking for acceptance, for approval, for peace.
Maybe yours is a different story. You accept this Love as real and set out to repay the debt you owe? You work tirelessly to earn the right to claim what you’ve been given as your own. You seek out “God’s will” for your life and work your heart and body and mind into the ground with your service to Him and His Kingdom. You may even be praised for your work and admired for your service, but you are left hollow inside. How much is enough? What happens if you fail? What if in your exhaustion you are faced with your limitations and you have fallen short? Will His love meet you there?
I believe it will my friend, and I want to share more openly with you. I need truth telling that is bold and courageous. Truth brings hope and light, freedom and joy! Let’s explore this together, this idea that love wins; that His love is enough. We are not enough – we weren’t meant to be! We are not called to be God, we are called to be His. Will you join me on this journey to freedom? I'd love to have you along. I need your perspective when I hold the binoculars too close, and maybe you need mine? We all need more truth telling in our lives, heaven knows the lies are all around and usually the loudest within.
Join me today and ask for His love to drive out your fear, and when that moment of peace fades, ask again, and again, and again..... I am.